Why Your Customer Lies (and How You Can Promote Honesty) – Sales Gravy
- “We’re just looking.”
- “Thanks, but we’re fine.”
- “No thanks, I’ll let you know if I need help.”
- “Let me think about it and get back to you.”
Lies. All lies. (Well, most of the time anyway.)
But WHY do they lie? These people look like fine, upstanding, honest individuals. So why lie?
Try looking at it from a different perspective. Why do you lie?
You do, you know. I’m sure you’ve found yourself in a purchasing environment – looking for a specific item – when a well-meaning salesperson asks, “Can I help you”? And instinctively, as if on auto-pilot, you blurt out, “No, I’m just looking.”
‘Fess up. Was that a lie? Have you ever said, “I’m just looking” when you were really thinking of purchasing something?
Of course you have. We all have. I personally find myself saying, “I’m just looking” and then immediately say to myself, “Dang – I need help; now what do I do”?
That “just looking” statement is an auto-response.
But, it’s also a lie.
The Anatomy of a Lie
I posed this question to an expert on a recent podcast recording. Steven Gaffney specializes in this sort of thing, working with organizations on increasing honesty in communication. So, I asked him straight up – why do customers lie?
Gaffney suggests that the core issue is not moral but emotional/psychological. Customers lie because they’re afraid. They have an underlying sense of fear.
Fear is the result of a perceived lack of safety. And this perceived lack of safety is the result of a lack of trust.
We don’t typically lie to people we trust or when we feel like we’re in a safe environment.
Consider this all-too-common sales question: “What’s your budget?”
What are the chances that you’re going to get a truthful answer? If there is a lack of trust, the chances of a truthful response are approximately 0.0%.
Increasing Trust (thus Increasing Safety, thus Increasing Honesty)
- Get Over Your Cynicism
The oft-used phrase, “Buyers are Liars” is catchy, but it’s also mentally dangerous to the sales professional.
If you’re expecting to find the worst in your customer’s character, you probably won’t be disappointed. Cynicism might feel good for a short time, but it’s really a form of passive aggressive behavior that benefits no one.
So, start there – protect the valuable real estate between your ears. Choose to see the best in the people around you.
- Stop judging
Remember, you also tend to lie to salespeople. Does that make you a bad person? No! It makes you a normal person. Like everyone else, before you can give the gift of honesty, you need to establish trust.
So why take it out on your customers. Simply recognize the fact that the core issue is emotional (fear), not ethical (honesty).
Stop making moral judgments. Instead, ask yourself what you can do to create an atmosphere of trust. Then you’ll remove a major tigger that promotes buyer lying.
- Practice Trust-Building Behaviors
Let’s get this straight… this is on you. The responsibility for building a sales environment where honesty is encouraged is on you.
You must make a personal decision to practice habits of kindness, service, and integrity – where what you say is what you do.
In other words, you need to create an environment where dishonesty serves no purpose.
Here’s the good news. Your customers want to be honest. They long for an atmosphere of trust. They need to share their story so you can best serve their needs.
Create an honest space. Trust me – you’ll change their world.
